It's like I'm back

I found this part of myself today. Smacking my forehead in my beloved testing center.  Everyone haaates the center. But I'm home there too. I think it's because it's quiet, and no one can tell me what to do there. I don't second guess myself because someone is doing something different. I don't hesitate to start punching numbers into my calculator because the guy next to me isn't punching numbers already. I'm right about half the time anyway.  And I don't like it when people tell me what to do. That's really why I walk around campus trying to find somewhere to study, like there aren't literally hundreds of emtpy chairs, some with padding, some with armrests, and some without. I have to find the right spot where there isn't someone to ruin it by tapping their pen, or looking at me sideways if I start looking at neimanmarcus.com or saksfifthavenue.com and keep doing it for like 40 minutes. I just want to do it my way. I just want to study without those boys calling me mack, and congratulating me for making it to school before noon.

That part of myself I was talking about earlier is that girl who, in Ms. Dobie's biology class, 9th grade, got the high score on the Functions of the Cell Test. The cell was so confusing with all its mitochondria, and endo plasmic reticulum, and golgi apparatus. There was no way to figure it all out. I just decided that I wanted to remember what all the names were, and what the silly things did, so I figured out how to remember it all. It was like the first time I 'studied.'  And today was the same. I was just so fed up with all the confusion in my brain that I took all day figuring it out. And I loved taking that test. And I was the happiest I have been in so long I can't even remember.  

Let's see if it will last after I get my score.

Saturday Night

Creative title, I know. Whatever.
Yesterday I took a big step in my life. I went through an important rite of passage for a Latter-Day Saint woman in her early 20's. That's right, I went shopping at Micheal's crafts, and Joanne Fabric Store. Not only did I go in, but I went in looking for specific items to use in a crafty project. I am really feeling like a whole new woman. But let's talk about how I walked around in circles at Joanne's because I couldn't find, well, anything really. I was surrounded by middle aged women, and newly-wed couples, yeah there were a lot of couples in there. Apparently, when you're a newlywed everything is fun, fun, fun. Because you're in love duh. They were all having a great time holding hands and kissing in line waiting for the ladies to cut their fabric. My favorite was this little boy who just wanted his mom to buy him something like she was doing for his sisters.
"Mom can I please have just ONE thing? I know exactly what I would get if you let me get one thing"
"No you are whining"
....
"If I don't whine for like, a while, can I get something?"
I sort of just wanted to buy him something because A) His mom totally tried to jump ahead of me in line (which is why I took the fabric out of her daughters hand and threw it two isles over, to get my spot back) and 2) she was bein all mean, "I'm glad you know exactly what one thing you'd get if I'd let you"
I can't go any further, or I'll blow the 'staprise' I'm building.
After my success I went over to the Jeff's and I'm reading Brenna this story about pirates written by Arthur Conan Doyle, and he wrote some confusing stuff. Brenna would ask me what a word meant, and like a 21st century girl, I would text google for the definition of depredation, and google would tell me an act of plundering, pillaging, and marauding, and Brenna and I would work that into the sentence and make sure we understood what this old guy was talking about.
Then Haley and I drooled over Robert Pattinson/Edward on the projector/ laughed our heads off at the cheesiest acting on the planet/ actually wished vampires were real and they would love us/ Haley fell asleep 15 minutes into the movie.
I'm rambling.
It's late.
I'm procrastinating homework.

Weird, weird, weird

I got to school at 8:30 today for a meeting at work. I worked until about 2:30, when I was a little hungry for lunch. I decided to get started on my homework anyway. I had some ridiculous homework assignments, and I almost got up and walked out of that computer lab a couple of times. I started to get a little hungry again around 5 for dinner, but I didn't want to lose my momentum. When it was 8:30 pm, I went to the vending machine for a granola bar, and I came to the realization that today was the most wonderful dayI have had in a long, long time. and it had nothing to do with the external things that were filling my time. As a matter of fact, being in literally the same building for 13 hours should make me upset, annoyed, stressed, bored, and otherwise absolutely crazy, but it didn't today. I was filled with peace. Which is unusual for me in this type of circumstance. There was something different going on inside of me.

And this is where I could get really long winded, but I'll just put it as simply as possible. 

I'm glad I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

John 14:27

This isn't really my news

But I'm so excited anyway!

I happen to be the newest fan of this school:

Maybe my budget will allow for another pair of new shoes...

two things:

honesty is (still) the best policy

and

if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all

that should keep me out of trouble.

I'm going to do this from now on

The one time I got a new wallet, I documented the old and the new. This is really exciting to share these unimportant, and completely ordinary things with the world (that consists of the readers of this blog which is up to 3 now... thanks guys!!)

Tonight was the night!

Out with the old...

(I have really torn it up with these vans, that big hole in the toe is from the time I almost died longboarding. I'm pretty sure I told my blog readers about that. And I hope you can see the outline of my toes on the tops of the shoes.)

In with the New...

I'm so excited about my grownup shoes

ps- i still love sushi. it's officially my new comfort food. 

I'm as Indecisive as They Come

I change my entire outfit at least once before leaving my apartment (Sundays it's usually more like 5-6 times.) I know this isn't unheard of, I'm just making a list of the things I have the hardest time making up my mind about.
I cannot order an entree at a restaurant without feeling like I only ordered it because everyone else at the table had already ordered their food, the third time the waiter came back.
When I find myself with any amount of time without some deadline in the next hour, I will usually sit there, or think myself in circles, trying to decide just what to work on. Often I tell myself after an hour of surfing the internet (because I just can't decide) "just do something, anything."
And just like that hour that is gone, gone, gone after I surfed the net (because of my fear of deciding) this same thing happens with boys. I'm not saying this is an Angela-from-the-Office one, but if I have a decision to make, I just don't. I just hold still until those things pass, and those boys are gone.
If I can't decide what to write about, I just hold my breath, and think it will come. And then I make drafts of ramblings that I don't publish because they have absolutely no point.

Just a little insight into my mind I guess. I listed some of things I've thought about writing about, but decided the thoughts or events weren't large or complete enough to actually trick you into spending time reading. This is for that fan club out there that I know checks my blog every hour, wondering what exciting things I am doing and thinking.

New niece: Annabelle Catherine Phillips-- she's going to be my future shopping partner

I have to do a project in my heat and mass transfer class, my group consists of me and three men. They decided to put me in charge of choosing our project, so I took it upon myself to also give us a team name "Beauty and the Geeks" (the best part is, they laughed harder than you are...if you are...)

I wore a skirt to school last Friday with leggings and flats. It snowed that day.

Speaking of skirts, I started this experiment. Two weeks ago, my Bishop's wife recommended that I wear a skirt to school on Friday, so the presidency could pick me up from campus and we could go to the temple. I sort of freaked out, because, like, I never wear skirts except for three hours on Sunday. And I live in this engineering building, where t-shirts and old jeans are the dress code, not respecting girls or boys. Ok, so I calmed down, and cowboyed up... Every, single, person asked me what the occasion was. I hate saying the temple for some reason (which is another issue I have that is unrelated to actually going to the temple...) oh I know the reason, it's pride. So I would answer with lines like "because girls wear skirts... remember I'm a girl?" That is when Fridays became Dress Up Days. The next Friday was the leggings deal, no questions whatsoever. So I'm like sweet, they think I dress nice all the time, so this means I'm not grundgy, engineer girl/boy. Today was the third Friday in a row, and every, single, person asked me agian, why I was dressed up. So I'll get back to you on my conclusion of this experiment.
And it's Friday, so I'm off to my lonely routine: the mall, the gym, sushi, early bedtime.
(These capital letters are for you Daddy)